‘Life is unfair’ ‘the world is cruel’, these are the things we find ourselves saying when things haven’t gone our way. We all have had our fair share of rejection, in some cases we do the rejecting. It could have been at school, home, in relationships, at work even, where you find yourself smaller and you just feel like dying on the spot. Rejection is an unpleasant experience, it affects one’s outlook on life, love and instills fear, doubt and a low self esteem. Sometimes you like a guy and you do all sorts of things to make sure he notices you, when he pays less attention to you and your advances, chances are your heart will be break, and that is the least pleasant of all things in this world. Rejection could also be caused by absent parents, those who are never there when you need them, they do not care how you get by or what happens in your life, to them you are not as important. At some point, you were aware of your strengths, and of how great you are, all things took a turn for the worse when you were rejected and told you are not good enough.
Rise above misery, what you believed to be awesome about yourself can’t be taken away from you just because you didn’t make the cut on Idols or Generations wanted a model- like person to fit their role. If your dear crush sees you as nothing but a ‘booty call’ not relationship material, then he is just not worth your awesome self. Move on, get over it….it’s not very easy but its possible.
Acknowledge the fact that everything happens for a reason, as cliched as you may think it is, yes there is a bigger reason why you were not chosen for something, it could be that you are not what they were looking for, not that you are not good enough, believe that your time is yet to come and everyone will see just how amazing you really are. There is a reason why dear crush doesn’t like you, the universe could be protecting you from a woman-beater, or a philanderer, or simply you are just not his type. Look at the bright side at least instead of bawling your eyes out.
Your happiness is reliant on only you and no one else, how you deal with rejection is important as it can affect your entire being.
Let go of the superficial need to be needed and seeking validation. Not everybody will like you, love yourself enough to live happily with that realization. Focus on yourself and what you can improve within you, sometimes you have absolutely nothing to fix, you are not the one with a problem. Imagine going to a bank and the teller out of the blue is rude to you, that person doesn’t know you, you did nothing wrong, they are the ones with the problem not you, the least you can do is feel sorry for them and how sad their life is. ‘Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence- Helen Keller.
The world is filled with billions of people all seeking love, attention and whatever feel will make them a better people. Of all these people, there will always be those that will leave you shattered because of the words they utter to you and you believing them, some will do things to leave you excluded, bruised and limping emotionally. Let them be, some are actually doing you a favour, showing you the door to an even better job , blissful marriage, education. Do not hate them, respect their choices and wish them well, that way you are liberating yourself from the pain of rejection and regaining your strength.
There are so many people who have been told they would never make it, been told they are ugly and that they would amount to nothing. Dj Sbu was told he had an unbearably ugly voice, he never let that get to him, today he is a famous radio personality. When you make other people’s opinions of you matter, then you are in trouble. Words have the ability to make or break you, choose to blot out negativity, refuse to let people’s words and actions leave you feeling less of a person. Do not suddenly settle for less because your high expectations and demands were rejected. If Jesus had people hating on him, why would you feel any less of a person because of being rejected by maybe three people. Life will always throw stones at you, how you react is important, you can always let them knock you down and kill you or choose to build up from them. Tell that guy that rejected you, you are better off without him and you are Jucy, and he is not! Stay winning!
Bonnie is an intern at Jucy Africa, she is into fashion, music and all things beautiful. On twitter she is @BonnieMes